Why Doesn’t Anyone Want To Drive Anymore?

Why don’t kids get their license at 16? Why do they wait so long?

Maybe things were different in the 90’s. Maybe they were different in The Dalles, OR.

I. could. not. wait. to get my license. It was freedom. It was hanging out with my friends. It was a way to work so my parents didn’t have to take me. It was also running errands at the grocery store so they didn’t have to!

On the day I turned 16 years old I had that bad boy. Oooooooh dang let’s cruise son. What a glorious time to be alive!

It’s really weird how quickly I felt comfortable. I don’t remember every being scared or worried. And I wasn’t crazy either! For the most part I traveled the speed limit and did my best to follow the rules. Even though it is built in my DNA to ignore the rules.

The car that was provided for me was a stick shift: 1987 BMW i5 or something. I don’t remember the exact model. It was a very nice car and I should’ve been grateful. Not only to have wheels to drive, but something that was reliable, safe, and looked really cool. I was not gracious. There was a persona that I tried to paint of who I was and what I wanted to be and this didn’t fit that mold. One of the many things from my childhood that I wished I had done differently.

I’d drive it to work at the Fred Meyer on the other side of town, go to McDonalds to get Big and Tasty’s, and over to smoke ciggies at my friends house. It was fucking awesome. I’d park it in the back alley behind my girlfriends house and at a spot near the alley by the high school every morning before class started.

Approximately 30-some days after securing this monumental drivers license, my friend and I left during lunch to go to Wendy’s. This was on the west side of town - maybe 10 minutes away.

In high school you could eat in the cafeteria, bring a lunch, or leave campus to do your own thing. We were a bunch of hoodrats. If we didn’t go somewhere to smoke weed, we would play hacky-sack in the alley by a chuch and smoke a few cigarettes, or drive to a fast food restaurant to get cheeseburgers.

Additionally, there was a rule/law that you could not have any passengers for the first 6 months after getting you license. I didn’t like that rule. I didn’t follow that rule.

I took a friend after the lunch bell and we jumped in the car to head over and get a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger. When we reached one of a few intersections in the tiny town, right next to the Taco Bell, the light turned yellow on me as we were approaching.

In my fragile inexperience I decided to gun it to get the delicious cheeseburgers into my mouth sooner.

A timid 60 year old man at that very moment decided he would beat the light too.

Unfortunately for me he was on the other side of the intersection and attempting to turn left, directly in my path of travel.

I crashed into his passenger door and my radiator started spilling green fluid all over the ground as I pulled into the gravel next to Taco Bell. A tablespoon of pee came out and made my pants wet.

What the fuck!

I yelled at Geary to get out of my car and run to the restaurant so I wouldn’t get a ticket for breaking the law.

Eventually my dad showed up, they towed the car, and it was totaled. My mom had a mini-mental breakdown and I went back to school.

I just don’t get it. What is wrong with kids today. Why doesn’t anyone want to drive anymore?